The Way I Live Now

I stumbled across a fascinating and enlightening article in the New York Times today. Eating for Eye Health confirms what I hoped my anti-inflammatory diet would do for me all along.  Though the article dealt with age-related macular degeneration, its findings are noteworthy and meaningful for those of us with macular degeneration. Period.   The article does not mention it by name, but all its food recommendations are perfectly in line with the anti-inflammatory way of eating.

Thank goodness.

When I began my anti-inflammatory diet, I honestly just sort of took a stab in the dark.  Anti-inflammatory diets are not concerned with ocular inflammation. Most folks think of inflammation of the joints...or some other tangible chronic pain.  My inflammation is a silent and painless one---when my right eye is duking out all sorts of neovascular and hemorrhaging activity, I honestly don't feel a thing.  At best/worst, I might get a headache because the flashes of light become overwhelming.  I embarked upon this diet out of hopelessness more than anything else.  Whether the diet could help ocular inflammation was a big unknown.

And then the article!  It's a small ray of hope for me.  Surely, some part of all this must help.

Today, my CSA with Lancaster Farm Fresh began.  My box was on the smaller side (typical for the early season) and filled with the makings of salad (lettuce, arugula, cress, radishes, mushrooms, scallions, and rhubarb).  I picked up some other goodies at the market, along with some fish because I was motivated by the article; my plan is to make some salad with seared salmon.  For dinner tonight I had leftover risotto with carrots and leeks.  I added a simple salad of lettuce, grape tomatoes, mushrooms, balsamic vinegar, and a sprinkle of flax seeds.  It was a very springtime dinner, which was a nice diversion from all the rain we've been experiencing lately.

...as for the rhubarb.  I'm going to try my hand at a rhubarb crisp, of which I will have one bite.  Friends will hopefully finish the rest.   Perhaps I'll see if I can track down a healthy rhubarb dessert recipe.  

Excuse me. Have you seen my diet?

I've been really bad!  This past weekend's beautiful weather made everything seem like a great idea.  

Friday:

You know, just when I was thinking about how I should detox from that greasy Teacher Appreciation luncheon, I fell off the wagon.  The weekend began with a bang with a bunch of friends in Olde City.  I was only supposed to have my one beer but then here I was, with a tequila sunrise.  At least I ate a Clif Bar before going out???

Saturday:

I woke up kind of hungover, being a lightweight these days.  Outside was 90 degrees and sunny!  I scampered around town picking up anti-inflammatory goodies; this was probably wishful thinking.  When I went home, I made yogurt (also wishful) and then met up with friends for a pre-dinner dinner.  Water ice!  Vegetarian Burrito!  Corona!  All in my tummy.  The beautiful weather made everything look so delicious and refreshing--and they were.  I had a great time. 

Ok, so what?  Big deal.  Just stop eating bad stuff after that, right?  

A good college friend was visiting, so the night was just getting started.  Here is where things went exponentially south. Hoping to show him a taste of the Philly foodie scene, I booked reservations at Matyson.  Both being very good walkers, we showed up too early and headed to a nearby bar where I decided to have what he was having: Jack Daniels on the rocks.  Like I said, everything just seemed like a fantastic idea this past weekend.  Dinner was good and I tried to stick to my anti-inflammatory plan.  We split a lump crab "cocktail" thing and then I had seared scallops.  Along the way, we are easily going through our bottle of wine.  Naturally, dessert seemed like a good idea!  I read glowing reviews of their butterscotch pudding, so you can see where this is headed.  It was so good!  So good!  I don't even care for sugar, but this was like drinkable dang it.

THEN.

I had to take him to Capogiro.  HAD TO.  He ordered the tangerine and dark chocolate.  For myself, the tangerine and Mexican chocolate.  At some point, we swapped so I guess I ended up eating dark chocolate too.  The weather was so wonderful, we decided to end the night with margaritas.  At this point, I was so drunk he ended up finishing my drink, thank goodness.

On Sunday, I woke up with a raging hangover and an aching tummy.  This is my retribution for playing with my diet these days.  Playtime was over and I tried to get my act together.  I drank tons of water and met up with my mama for some steamed fish and sauteed snow pea greens.  It's time to detox for real.  This week's lineup of meals include pasta with seared shrimp, salmon and lentils, and quinoa stuffed bell peppers.   Along the way, I'll be popping fish oil capsules and drinking my Vega protein shakes...

2009: Year of Stupid

The universe hates me.  I am sure of it now and wonder how stupid 2009 will get before I hit bottom.  I had a disheartening eye appointment today.  My vision has worsened since December and there's blood in the back of my eye.  After five hours at Wills Eye, I walked out with another Avastin injection, a $15 copay, a $100 injection bill, and a tender bloodshot eye.  I ended up bursting into tears at the doctor's office, which was mortifying and another stupid thing that happened. Hey, at least my antibiotic drops were free...thanks, universe.

So, now I'm questioning a lot of things.  I was so excited about my new approaches but it's been close to five months now.  I am trying to get my new batch of acupuncture treatments refunded; at $500 a month, I'm not convinced this is worth it.  I'm broke and stressed about being broke...on top of stressing about all those other things 2009 has dumped on me (personal life falling apart, crashed hard drive, piling debt, lost luggage...it's really getting a bit unbelievable).  

What to do?  I'm free and clear of auto-immune activity, so I'm back at square one.  My retina specialist has a hunch that this is infectious in origin but that's all he's got.  Hopefully I can get my acupuncture refund and that will help ease my mind.  I'm still sticking to the diet though; I have had too many other health benefits and honestly, I like eating healthier.  

Here's to my rotten day.  I'm gonna finish my soy chicken cheese steak now and then drown my sorrows in really bad television.

A New Dilemma

So, my magical diet has created a new problem: I'm losing too much weight.  I know some people might think I sound obnoxious.  How can you complain about losing weight? Well, if you are born tiny and every pound is literally more than one percentage of total weight, this is worth worrying about.  At first, it was kind of a novelty to see my little paunch gradually shrink.  But then, I kept shedding the pounds.  

Now, I'm struggling to maintain a weight above 90 pounds and getting worried that I'll dip into the 80s.  I have always been a small person (a petite 5 ft), but I have not been this thin since high school...I can easily wear three shirts without any loss in mobility and today, I had to adjust my skirt which kept trying to turn itself backwards. Oh yeah, I can also slip my pants off with any unbuttoning or unzipping--convenient and efficient, no?  Er, not to mention completely sexy. ;)

But I guess the kicker came when my therapist changed the subject today to tell me she was worried.  I'm shrinking at a rapid rate and "can't bear to lose anymore," she says.  She specializes in eating disorders, and I couldn't help but wonder if she suspected a disorder (story of my life).  So now I'm off to see another medical professional--this time: nutritionist.  Hopefully, I can find a way to still eat healthy and gain weight.  Sigh.  To be honest, I'm tiring of dealing with my health.  I feel like my days are spent shuttling myself around to various health appointments.  I miss the days when I worked my usual long hours and just came straight home...

After my alarming appointment, I came home and proceeded to stuff my face with food.  Bring on the sesame snack sticks, Wasa rye crackers, and a giant bowl of brown rice and cabbage with tofu.  I feel full after my meals but apparently, this is not enough.  

More Recipes

Here are some of the latest dishes I've tried.


Provencal kale and cabbage gratin
(This was quite delicious! Definite keeper.)

Oven steamed salmon with lentils
(Mmm. Savory.)

Vegetarian Dumplings
(These were fun to make...I'm going to make a bunch and freeze them so I always have a snack. Lady-J came over to help me with these; our dumpling party was fun!)

Stir-fried Bok Choy, Shitake, and Tofu
(This was my own culinary creation. I added a dash of black bean garlic sauce for some kick and then served over brown rice. Yum!)


The remainder of last week was spent either at a restaurant (pesto and shrimp pasta; smoked salmon sandwich) or at my sister's (fish poached in a soy sauce base with spinach and mushrooms).

My meals have been pretty tasty so far. I'm frustrated with my yogurt lately--I keep burning the milk and have effectively wasted an entire carton of expensive organic milk. Grumble grumble.

Menu Ideas

When I first started this diet, I had some trouble finding recipes.  I'm going to start posting my weekly menus and links to recipes, where applicable, so newcomers can get ideas of what the heck to eat.  It can be really tough figuring out what to cook, esp. if the new diet changes your current eating patterns.   Hope this helps.

Last week's meals:

Tofu Provencal with Quinoa (surprisingly good)

Barley Soup with Mushrooms and Kale 

Foil-baked Cod with Soy-Lemon Broccoli and Brown Rice (dress the broccoli very lightly--otherwise it will be too salty)

Honey-Soy Broiled Salmon with Sauteed Kale and Quinoa (delicious)

Sesame-crusted Tofu with Soba Noodles (too salty; tone down the soy sauce!)

My breakfasts always consists of non-fat plain yogurt and a Chunk of Energy or two.  Snacks include Chunks, nuts, banana nut bread, edamame, and fruit.

A New Beginning

After years of increasing unhappiness with my primary care office, I finally switched practices.  My "new" doctor is actually someone I used to see when I was in high school, until she left the practice and then was hard to locate.  But now I'm reunited--and she even recognized me after 10 years.  Nuts.

I'm thrilled with her.  She was inquisitive and sincere; basically, she treated me like an actual human.  I'm very proud to report that she thinks I'm super healthy, thanks to my super diet.  She remarked on my clear skin (so did my sister the other night!), low blood pressure (I now join the ranks of yogis, she said), and tiny tummy.  She did notice that I'm shrinking too quickly and was alarmed to find my BMI creeping off the low end of the chart.   My new goal is to gain weight while eating healthy...this is a strange spot to be in.  

My doctor also prescribed me pharmacy-grade fish oil caplets which I now take daily.  They are giant yellow horse pills but on my script plan, still cheaper than the lower quality stuff at GNC.  It was also nice to know that these high quality supplements are actually better for me than eating fish directly.  Apparently, there are too many contaminants in fish these days; I also don't like the taste of farmed fish as much.  Anyways, so far so good.  I've heard that fish oil supplements can cause eternal fish breath, so I'll have to monitor that.  

On a slightly bleaker note, she also ordered a full auto-immune workup (ANA sed rate, C-reactive, etc) in an effort to pinpoint my mysterious eye problem.  I forked over three vials of blood and almost passed out.  She also hopes my insurance will cover these tests; otherwise, I will be facing several hundred dollars worth of damage.  :(

Well, mark your calendars for April 13th when I next visit Wills Eye.  We shall see if my dieting and acupuncture have done anything...If anything, according to my sister, my hair is "so nice and black!"  That's worth it, right?